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Post by zAkAtAk on Mar 12, 2010 10:25:53 GMT -5
Sex is a very prominant pressure in our society and around the world. Kids are being pressured to lose their virginity at younger and younger ages. MTV even has shows that have teenage pregnant girls on their shows every week. You can talk about when you lost your V-card and why. Do you think that your friends, parents, the media, religion, or culture has played a part in whether or not you are going to lose it?
I know this may be a sensitive subject for some people. I urge you to vote, but you do not need to post if you feel uncomfortable.
I added the last option for those that had no choice in the matter of whether or not they should lose their virginity.
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Post by Breepop on Mar 12, 2010 12:08:52 GMT -5
Those are the only things that play a part in it. >.>
Besides your libido I guess. BUT WHO'S COUNTING THAT.
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Post by cadetpewpew on Mar 12, 2010 13:00:19 GMT -5
I know this is going to sound really offensive to some,but to me only a very weak person,who doesn't know how to stand their ground can be pressured into sex.Not talking about sexual abuse here. Other people are just horny,but afraid to admit it. No,I'm not a virgin and I don't see what the big deal is,really. Some of my friends and acquitances lost theirs when they were about 12-13 and there wasn't such a big fuss about it,just the usual 'So,how was it,tell us more' and stuff. But that's what teenagers do,they have sex and then they tell each other stuff. Or maybe that's the society I grew up in?
And I was never pressured,I was never in the state of 'Ooooh,I'm not ready,blah,blah,blah'. Actually I was probably the more enthusiastic,now that I think about it,because the guy I did it with was definitely not a virgin,so he was more like the calm before the storm if you know what I mean ;D
So,moral of the story is-guys make love,it's healthy. Just,you know...don't rape each other and use condoms,please,no one wants your retarded spuds.
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Post by zAkAtAk on Mar 12, 2010 13:06:43 GMT -5
Those are the only things that play a part in it. >.> Besides your libido I guess. BUT WHO'S COUNTING THAT. I'm asking which ones were more dominant. If you don't follow religion, you're obviously not going to stay a virgin for religious reasons.
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Post by Breepop on Mar 12, 2010 13:06:51 GMT -5
I know this is going to sound really offensive to some,but to me only a very weak person,who doesn't know how to stand their ground can be pressured into sex.Not talking about sexual abuse here. Other people are just horny,but afraid to admit it. No,I'm not a virgin and I don't see what the big deal is,really. Some of my friends and acquitances lost theirs when they were about 12-13 and there wasn't such a big fuss about it,just the usual 'So,how was it,tell us more' and stuff. But that's what teenagers do,they have sex and then they tell each other stuff. Or maybe that's the society I grew up in? And I was never pressured,I was never in the state of 'Ooooh,I'm not ready,blah,blah,blah'. Actually I was probably the more enthusiastic,now that I think about it,because the guy I did it with was definitely not a virgin,so he was more like the calm before the storm if you know what I mean ;D So,moral of the story is-guys make love,it's healthy. Just,you know...don't rape each other and use condoms,please,no one wants your retarded spuds. So there was never the pressure of having sex in your school? o.o For me, in high school (and college now), the mood was like "OH MY GOD YOU'RE A VIRGIN!?!?!?!?! HOLY SHIRT YOU NEED TO GET LAID!!!!!!!! DAYUM" I personally never felt that pressure, but it was still there. I guess he could have also meant pressure from your boyfriend/girlfriend, though.
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Post by cadetpewpew on Mar 12, 2010 13:45:21 GMT -5
I know this is going to sound really offensive to some,but to me only a very weak person,who doesn't know how to stand their ground can be pressured into sex.Not talking about sexual abuse here. Other people are just horny,but afraid to admit it. No,I'm not a virgin and I don't see what the big deal is,really. Some of my friends and acquitances lost theirs when they were about 12-13 and there wasn't such a big fuss about it,just the usual 'So,how was it,tell us more' and stuff. But that's what teenagers do,they have sex and then they tell each other stuff. Or maybe that's the society I grew up in? And I was never pressured,I was never in the state of 'Ooooh,I'm not ready,blah,blah,blah'. Actually I was probably the more enthusiastic,now that I think about it,because the guy I did it with was definitely not a virgin,so he was more like the calm before the storm if you know what I mean ;D So,moral of the story is-guys make love,it's healthy. Just,you know...don't rape each other and use condoms,please,no one wants your retarded spuds. So there was never the pressure of having sex in your school? o.o For me, in high school (and college now), the mood was like "OH MY GOD YOU'RE A VIRGIN!?!?!?!?! HOLY SHIRT YOU NEED TO GET LAID!!!!!!!! DAYUM" I personally never felt that pressure, but it was still there. I guess he could have also meant pressure from your boyfriend/girlfriend, though. Well of course there was that pressure,and still is,but I don't think that it was that bad,I mean it was like 'Oh,so you're a virgin...well good for you' No one really cares. It's like,not that it isn't important at all,but I think that people here take it more like it's not their deal who has fucked and who hasn't.
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pnla
Meteorite
Posts: 40
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Post by pnla on Mar 12, 2010 14:31:07 GMT -5
I don't really think that people are pressured anymore, except a little from who ever they lose it from, but rather it's just mostly because sex is glorified. It's like 'oh your virgin, good for you' vs. 'oh you just lost your virginity!? well give me all the horny details!' vs. 'oh your pregnant? well don't worry I'll always be here to give you support and unnecessary attention and remind you that being pregnant at 14 is totally normal.' A lot of it has to do with the attention we get, not all of it of course. I'm not saying every person who loses their v-card does it for the attention, but I do think that sex is so heavily planted into our minds from media as being a good thing that most people tend to forget about the negative aspects. Though I will say that the vast majority of young teen pregnancies these days are indeed because of attention, depending on the environment one grows up in of course, but generally young teens are well educated on how to not get pregnant. I'm religious but my decision to stay a virgin till marriage would probably hold even without it, simply because I know that 99% of guys (well where I live) only want sex, and will do anything to get, even be in a relationship for years, since its rather easy to just cheat on her without her finding out(again though, that's mostly just because of where I live). But marriage is different, it's a lot harder to just leave the girl after the honeymoon(well unless you book it to another state for several years). Not to mention the amount of guys that string a girl along, she thinks they'll get married one day, he just wants a constant sex buddy and someone to cook and clean for him.
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Post by chelseeyuh on Mar 12, 2010 15:20:13 GMT -5
I do think there is some pressure from society and other teens for teenagers to lose their virginity. I know people that ask other people if they're a virgin, just so they can have the satisfaction of laughing at them when they say that they are. Teens try to make other teens feel ashamed for being virgins. I think this is pretty funny, though, considering I know so many people that have sex just so they can feel a sense of worth. If anyone should be ashamed, it's the people that have sex just to fit in, make someone like them, feel better about themselves, etc.
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pnla
Meteorite
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Post by pnla on Mar 12, 2010 15:57:31 GMT -5
I do think there is some pressure from society and other teens for teenagers to lose their virginity. I know people that ask other people if they're a virgin, just so they can have the satisfaction of laughing at them when they say that they are. Teens try to make other teens feel ashamed for being virgins. I think this is pretty funny, though, considering I know so many people that have sex just so they can feel a sense of worth. If anyone should be ashamed, it's the people that have sex just to fit in, make someone like them, feel better about themselves, etc. You make a good point, but then these are probably the same girls that would laugh at you for doing just about anything that they don't do and vice versa. They just like having the satisfaction of making others feel bad about themselves but they also don't make up a very large majority of the population. Some schools and communities are completely free of people like that so i guess whether or not sex is pressured on others by their peers is something that varies from community to community and social group to social group, and their effectiveness depends upon the person's self-image and such. So yah basically what I'm saying is that when it comes something as general as the entire world or certain countries or even just the say the U.S. it's not so much pressure, but if you look at individual communities peer pressure for things like that varies a lot. So i guess it all depends of your definition of 'society.'
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bleabot
Moon
Set phazors to dance, Mr. Warf.
Posts: 109
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Post by bleabot on Mar 12, 2010 16:13:11 GMT -5
What a coincidence...this morning I read an article about a woman who was in a car crash which left her sexually aroused 24/7. The slightest movement sets it off. God, that would be terrible D=
Anyway, I never felt pressure. In my area, if you're a virgin, nobody really cares. I'm sure there is pressure in some cliques, but there hasn't been much from my point of view. I am a virgin simply because I couldn't care less about having a girlfriend right now. I'm not looking for one and don't want one at this point. I think this is due to the fact that a lot of the girls at my school seem unbelievably immature (I'm not talking about being silly or bubbly, mind you)...or I'm just afraid of commitment. I'm not sure which one is more true yet. =P
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Post by Lex on Mar 12, 2010 16:59:19 GMT -5
I don't understand this 'pressure'. I've never ever encountered this 'insane peer pressure' that causes people to do ridiculous things. Like, yeah, if everyone else does it, you might feel left out, but it won't affect my judgment. I'm not going to go do something stupid just because other people do it, I'll do it only if I want to do it.
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Post by RandiKthxxx on Mar 12, 2010 21:09:31 GMT -5
Most teens are pretty impressionable. Honestly, I don't know what I'd do if I were actually presented with the opportunity (had a good steady relationship with a good guy). I'd like to think that I'd have the willpower to wait, but honestly there's no telling.
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Post by Jake on Mar 13, 2010 5:04:42 GMT -5
I don't understand this 'pressure'. I've never ever encountered this 'insane peer pressure' that causes people to do ridiculous things. Like, yeah, if everyone else does it, you might feel left out, but it won't affect my judgment. I'm not going to go do something stupid just because other people do it, I'll do it only if I want to do it. I think you're right: there usually isn't much pressure from people to lose their virginity, in the sense that very few people would deliberately make fun of someone for being a virgin or put obvious pressure on them. The pressure more comes from people making the decision that they want to fit in - even if they aren't being forced to fit in.
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Post by PunchJunky on Mar 13, 2010 11:26:17 GMT -5
I totally read the title as,
"Virginity and Sexual Pleasure"
Would be a much different thread yessir!
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LegacyOfPaper
Moon
Why yes, I would like a side of fries
Posts: 178
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Post by LegacyOfPaper on Mar 13, 2010 11:44:15 GMT -5
I am, but quite honestly I could lose it if I wanted to. I'm just old fashioned. :V
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pnla
Meteorite
Posts: 40
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Post by pnla on Mar 13, 2010 12:46:35 GMT -5
I totally read the title as, "Virginity and Sexual Pleasure"Would be a much different thread yessir! I totally did the exact same thing at first lol
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Post by smilee on Mar 13, 2010 13:33:28 GMT -5
I totally read the title as, "Virginity and Sexual Pleasure"Would be a much different thread yessir! I totally did the exact same thing at first lol Haha me too. But addressing the topic of this thread, I don't believe I could lose my virginity until I'm far away from where I live. Here anyone that is sexually active and not married is looked down upon. My mom sneers at teenagers if she hears them mention sex. My mom tells me that I shouldn't read books that mention sex unless the book shows it in a bad light. Also, I'm in a very very very religious area of the country. There's a church on just about other block and all of the private schools are Christian private schools. So if I were to become sexually active, I'd probably be looked down upon in my community.
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Post by cadetpewpew on Mar 13, 2010 14:29:44 GMT -5
I'm not saying every person who loses their v-card does it for the attention, but I do think that sex is so heavily planted into our minds from media as being a good thing that most people tend to forget about the negative aspects. Did you just seriously say that MEDIA has PLANTED sex as a GOOD thing in our minds? If sex is not a good thing,what the fuck else is? Usually(not a 100% of times,of course) sex is the best thing in a relationship. Or at least the peak of one. It's a way to show your ultimate affection for someone and of course one of the few free pleasures left on earth. It was not PLANTED in my brain that sex is good,because sex IS good. In my family there was never a prohibition or even a talk about sex. My parents just said 'Do whatever you like,just don't do anything stupid okay?' and that was it. And I don't think that I'm less of a person. I'm not saying anything against your beliefs,it's your choice,and I respect it,but seriously? Would you explain to me a little bit as to why you think sex is a bad thing? And what other negative sides are there to it,except for the eventual STD,or in the worst case AIDS... Again,not talking about sexual abuse,just normal sex.
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Post by Lex on Mar 13, 2010 14:46:48 GMT -5
I'm not saying every person who loses their v-card does it for the attention, but I do think that sex is so heavily planted into our minds from media as being a good thing that most people tend to forget about the negative aspects. Did you just seriously say that MEDIA has PLANTED sex as a GOOD thing in our minds? If sex is not a good thing,what the fuck else is? Usually(not a 100% of times,of course) sex is the best thing in a relationship. Or at least the peak of one. It's a way to show your ultimate affection for someone and of course one of the few free pleasures left on earth. It was not PLANTED in my brain that sex is good,because sex IS good. In my family there was never a prohibition or even a talk about sex. My parents just said 'Do whatever you like,just don't do anything stupid okay?' and that was it. And I don't think that I'm less of a person. I'm not saying anything against your beliefs,it's your choice,and I respect it,but seriously? Would you explain to me a little bit as to why you think sex is a bad thing? And what other negative sides are there to it,except for the eventual STD,or in the worst case AIDS... Again,not talking about sexual abuse,just normal sex. But you are not in a relationship just for the sex, am I right? I think the point that pnla was trying to get across was that sex is everywhere in the media. Sex is part of life, that's it. It's not some crazy divine thing like the media portrays it to be.
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Post by UnfairBear on Mar 13, 2010 14:51:32 GMT -5
I was never pressured into losing my virginity. I just really really wanted to since I was like 10, and didn't want to wait until I was 18, which was what I considered socially acceptable at the time (I was 15 when I lost it). But nobody in my school was sexually active or anything, nobody pressured anyone or laughed at them for not having sex. If anything people were probably looked down on for having it, even though it wasn't a particularly conservative school. There was never any of that kind of pressure in my second school either even amongst girls in their late teens. Maybe there's more pressure in those schools now, 5 years on, i dont know. I think it's a cultural/location thing too, the stories about people being pressured into sex seem to mostly come from the US. I havn't really seen anything of it here.
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